FeRAWRri XD
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virginsacrificer:

my dates mom: where ya goin
my date: im just taking the trash out

(via virginsacrificer)

Source: virginsacrificer
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mormondad:

real life high school advice:

  • dont slack 
  • be friends with everyone 
  • kiss ass like there is no tomorrow

(via retiredjesus)

Source: mormondad
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trust:

i think the only thing ill ever be proud of is one of my selfies being used as a emo porn site advertisement 

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(via sleeve)

Source: trust
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50shadesofyodaddysdick:

boyfriend: what’s for dinner?

me:

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(via kimpissable)

Source: 50shadesofyodaddysdick
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ushkoriley:

Damn Charlotte, you just gonna put a dude out there like that?

(via jesuschristvevo)

Source: ushkoriley
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  • elementary school: I went to bed at 10
  • everyone: omg thats so cool
  • middle school: I went to bed at 10
  • everyone: wow loser
  • high school: I went to bed at 10
  • everyone: omg luckyyyy
  • college: I went to bed at 10
  • everyone: is that even possible
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whorville:

*whispers to you during sex*

Don’t forget to rate, comment, and subscribe

(via supnikita)

Source: whorville
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michaxl:

i dont need you, i have other people i can talk to

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(via communistbakery)

Source: britneythrowsspears
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el-leon:

GOD BLESS THIS PERSON’S SOUL.  IT’S TRANSPARENT.

IT LOOKS LIKE IT’S CLIMBING DOWN MY BLOG. CRYCRYCRY.

(via retiredjesus)

Source: mxxchy
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cokeflow:

foxnewsofficial:

hey science side of tumblr there’s a load of blood in my ear what’s up with that

it’s bleedin

(via fruitcrocs)

Source: foxnewsofficial
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spamanos:

zeus took fuck, marry, kill way too seriously

(via primacdonaldsgirl)

Source: spamanos